A soul composed of courage seeks redemption through faith in life.
Contents
. dispose . despair . denigrate . denounce
Denigrate
to defame
to darken or discolour
to become worthless
WIND TORN SHAME
rising up before
my own nauseated mind
because it's not the first time
I've found myself
dizzying my swerve
second guessing what I deserve—
today I became
everything I loathed
and what's more
the rift of pain
is all I can cry for
pry this dying from
the fighting fit of a little girl
in my heart
the torment of such joys
tease social paradigms
and if only I can reject
engrained ideas of perfection'
I could let this be
but may there never be
tormented love in my life
I vowed long ago
to banish that ship to far away shoreline
so then I can swim safely and free
in a sea
taking tides in stride
and avoiding calamity
of the sails whips
whispers through their boughs
I could sense and see
those undertows
from a safe distance
that is the condition
my heart demands
at this parting of winds
I find the time— let shine
be damned if stormed minds
take deck or have say
I repeat
as words of reassurance
when the world can’t deliver me
the ideas I have about safety and security
there is always those in time
never chase around for chimes
my heart knows its own rhyme
to raise up shame and blast its tarp
for wind blows it apart from me.
ALRIGHT
Every sense of vague is a memory
of every single one of the temporal discrepancies
in outer space flights passing through our bodily rights
So who sets the lines with the lines of the crazy
when people are trying to rewrite history
the order of that which generates life
I demand
and screw for a screeching halt
to the sips on the tilted invention making
rhetoric up
calling interdependency, co as if
each one was alone
so while the affectations
dump their whole damn cup on my head
I’ve been baptised already
by blood and water of life
so little to no tendency
have I to conform to absurdity
absconded from the confines of the dark minds
those who feign to do much
yet little in reality
to pacify anyone’s pain
and delight in the tears before my eyes
this is it, the only now
until the next one pleads again—
why ask for freedom
and wait
for the agency to create
our own happy endings
carrying upon our backs
entire stories in tow
someone had the nerve to say
I'm so full of it
so why don't you come
get some of whatever it you mean
make like you already know me
pretending we’ve lived lifetimes before.
so believe me or not
I am here to help you learn
to move your own way
despite his diction
and while more than a little bit
difficult to discern
freedom is found just off the ramp
from the wheel of self-destruction
let no apprehensions
keep me, from living a life
worth remembering
gone down from my crazy horse
after I rode back on the wings
of a spirited memory
I'm alright
feeling better about
what life allows to
be made of me.
CATCH MY BREATH
walking bare foot through the sidewalks of my time
I'm dreaming before ever stepping into bed
in a place of white that looks lies
and less like love
the dignity in which soul roves
over plains of indiscernible rows
but let me catch my breath
may I please, paraphrase here
and catch my breath
it's a start, a slight of heart by making peace with the past
from a view, as minuscule as the thief of desire
dancing in the trough and stirring up the thoroughfare
but let me catch my breath
may I please, paraphrase here
and catch my breath
it's been a busy week and I can't seem to keep up
attempting never before seen feats
my mind running, at least ten steps ahead
I approach the comfort of a palm
within the inner turmoil a dignified well of tranquility
delighting dances of aromatic benevolence
round the corner of betterment in each breath
may I please, paraphrase here
and catch my breath
catch my breath.
HOLDING TO STILL
In lapses of mere melted flakes, flippant
kissed lids, seconds fell as snow
twinkling lashes danced
flutter, rise and sigh.
Open, not tonight
a watch we never are strike
Keen on queues
we hold our breath
nearing the entrance
the song’s lumen fell
a prior press of reassurance
his eyes matched
to light each move
swiftly and hush
fevered adoration
for an adornment of
impeccable timing
I knew that kind of love
was for-ever binding.
© Mari Amman. All Rights Reserved.
Poetry, Prose &Suche VOL II.
First edition 2023, electronic distribution. Text and Images by Mari Amman.
The poems contained within this volume were drafted circa 2006-2009, in Chicago, USA, and edited during spring 2023 in Paris, France, with the enormous support of The Trélex Residency.
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